New Year Vibes!! Do You Have Them?!

My wife, Katie, spends a significant amount of time in preparation for every new year by looking back at the last year. She prints photobooks of her Insta posts of the prior year to help recall the moments and memories that were worth posting. She evaluates the core areas of her life and our family, making an honest assessment of where she is and how we are doing. After sitting in what is she starts dreaming about what could be. She gives language to her dreams of what could be, upon which she breaks them down over 12 months establishing key priorities for each month and measurable actions that will get her there. At some point before New Year’s Eve she will write January’s weekly goals on the white board in our hallway to give some accountability for what she plans to accomplish.

Now, you may be thinking, “Wow. They must be a very productive couple.” Can you imagine two people giving that much time, intentionality, reflection, and preparation heading into a new year!? It should come as no surprise that I on the other hand, cheer her on in her pursuits and do none of the above.  Katie is a visionary and her actions today are 1/365^th of a much bigger plan she is executing based on what she feels like God has called her to. Me on the other hand, I simply believe that tomorrow is going to be better than today and hope that God is helping me get better and closer to where He wants me to be day by day. It has always been challenging for me to cultivate vision for my life a year from now, so I tend to show up and try to bring my best each day.

I don’t know that It’s possible to have two people who approach the New Year or tomorrow for that matter more differently than Katie and me. We are different. Chances are, you and your spouse have some areas of your personalities, preferences and behaviors that are different too. Different in marriage is a good thing. After all, it was God who said,

It is not good for [‘Josh’] to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him. — Genesis 2:18

In His kindness, God crafted a woman who would spur me on to think bigger, plan better and become (alongside her) all He created me to be. We are different. I’m not sure if I am an over achiever or if I cause her to be an underachiever, either way, together we tend to accomplish more than we could have asked or imagined.

Depending on the source, most studies say that only 8-9% of people accomplish their goals any given year. Whether it’s because they approach the process of goal setting, their plans for the year or mindset on tomorrow differently, who knows. That said, 

• the one thing that over 90% of Americans have in common is the tendency to quit. 

Have you ever heard the saying, ‘When the going gets tough, the tough get going.’ Growing up I understood that to mean when things get hard you lean in, work harder and ‘get going’ through the pain. These days, 90% of Americans seem to think when the going gets tough, I’m going to get going… out of here. It’s one thing to bail on the gym, your job, or your momentary passion for paleo. There are countless ways to stay fit, provide and eat healthy. But, what happens when our willingness to throw in the towel, to call it quits has a generational impact?

In John 16:33 Jesus assures us that,

In this world you will have trouble.

Meaning there are going to be times when the going gets tough. We expect that in our jobs, finances, health, parenting, the list goes on and on. But one of the areas we’re often surprised to find trouble and all to willing to call it quits is in our marriage. Its no coincidence that Ephesians 5:25 calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Meaning when your wife rejects you, denies you or mocks you - continue to lay your life down for her. Aren’t you thankful Jesus didn’t call it quits? His willingness to persevere, His willingness to S.T.A.Y. on the cross paid the price for you and I to have new, full and abundant life. 2 Corinthians 5:17, John 10:10

Has it been a tough season in your marriage? Does fun and flirty seem far gone? Do you want to feel something new? Something better? You don’t have to call it quits to experience the satisfaction you desire. What if the marriage you’ve always wanted was on the other side of the challenges, complacency, and fatigue you now face? Joining the 8-9% of people who get what they desire each year can be possible when it comes to your marriage, all you have to do is S.T.A.Y.

Start with me

Take quitting off the table

Allow others to be a part of your story

Yield to vision

We’ve seen these principles bear fruit in our marriage in the darkest and hardest days. As you kick off a New Year, if you will commit to applying these principles, we are confident you can see them bring about breakthrough in yours.  New Year. New Marriage, Same Couple. It’s yours for the taking!

A Message from Josh & Katie

Written for Devotionals Daily by Josh Walters, co-author with Katie Walters of New Marriage, Same Couple.

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Your Turn

Married folk, if there’s one goal that’s all too worthy this year, it’s to grow and flourish with your spouse! Reclaim the excitement and freshness of your romance. Rededicate your marriage to Jesus. God has more for you and your spouse. New year. New Marriage, Same Couple. ~ Devotionals Daily