My husband and I have a friend who is gifted in many ways, but he has shut God out of his life, blaming Him for a car accident in which his sister was killed and he was injured severely enough to end his promising sports career. Years after that accident, he still bitterly questions why God didn’t keep it from happening. The truth is, the accident was never part of God’s plan. It was the devil who came to destroy because death is a part of his plan. Our friend is a good man, but he is agonizingly frustrated and unfulfilled because he has shut God off from working powerfully in his life.
Blaming God is far more common than most of us care to admit, especially for those who have been abused, neglected, or deeply disappointed by authority figures. The tendency is to think subconsciously of God as being like that abusive father, grandparent, teacher, or boss, projecting on Him attitudes and behavior that have nothing to do with who He really is.
We also blame God for anything negative our parents told us about ourselves. We feel God must have created us the way they say we are, and we wonder why He was so careless. We also project human imperfections onto Him. For example, we blame Him if our parents didn’t want or love us.
The lie we believe when we blame God is, “God could have kept this from happening. He could have made things different.” The truth is God has given us a free will, which He won’t violate. As a result, we all make choices, and things are often the way they are because of those choices. God also gives us limitations and boundaries for our protection. If we will to violate that order, leaving our circumstance to chance or the work of the enemy, we breed destruction.
Blaming God is a no-win attitude.
We back ourselves into a corner with no way out instead of recognizing God as the only way out. Blaming God produces misplaced anger that will be channeled inward — making you sick, frustrated, and unfulfilled — or outward, causing you to hate a husband or wife, to abuse a child, to treat a friend rudely, to be uncooperative with a fellow worker, or to lash out at strangers.
To stop blaming God, we have to know what He is really like.
And we can find out by looking to Jesus, who said,
He who has seen Me has seen the Father. — John 14:9
Unless we truly let Jesus penetrate every part of our lives, we won’t ever really know what God is like.
When you truly know Jesus, you see that Father God is faithful and compassionate. His love is unlimited and unfailing. He does not neglect, abuse, forget, or misunderstand. He will never disappoint or be imperfect. When we understand who God really is and stop blaming Him, we find peace and security.
If you are mad at God, then you need to get to know Him better because there is a lot about Him that you don’t fully understand. The best thing to do is to be honest with Him about it. You won’t hurt God’s feelings — He has known about it all along anyway. Pray to Him saying, “Father I have been angry at You because of this particular situation (be specific). I have hated this, and I’ve blamed You for it. Please forgive me and help me to be released from it. Take away my misconceptions about You and help me to know You better.”
The opposite of blaming God is trusting Him. Decide now whom you will trust. You can’t move into all God has for you if any bitterness and misplaced blame have a place in your heart. If you’ve been mad at God, say so. “God, I’ve been mad at You ever since my brother was killed in that accident.” “God, I’ve been mad at You since my baby died.” “God, I’ve been mad at You ever since I didn’t get that job I prayed for.” Be honest. You won’t crush God’s ego. Release the hurt and let yourself cry. Tears are freeing and healing. Pray a prayer of release: “Lord, I confess my hurt and my anger and my hardness of heart toward You. I no longer hold that offense against You.”
Here are seven verses to remind you of the goodness of God. You can pray them as a prayer of release:
Surely God will never do wickedly, nor will the Almighty pervert justice. — Job 34:12
Blessed are all those who put their trust in Him. — Psalm 2:12
He will deliver the needy when he cries. — Psalm 72:12
Those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing. — Psalm 34:10
You are my help and my deliverer. — Psalm 70:5
I will make darkness light before them, and crooked places straight. — Isaiah 42:16
The Lord will deliver me from every evil work and preserve me for His heavenly kingdom. — 2 Timothy 4:18
Pray a prayer of release: “Lord, I confess my hurt and my anger and my hardness of heart toward You. I no longer hold that offense against You.
Blame can plant a seed of bitterness deep in your heart. Be honest with yourself and write down any experiences in your life where you blame God. Pray to release these hurts from your life and to trust God in all that you do.
Excerpted with permission from Seven Prayers Devotional Journal by Stormie Omartian, copyright Stormie Ormartian.
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Your Turn
Are you angry with God? Maybe anger at the Lord sounds terrible so you pretend you’re not mad. But you are. Today, let’s be honest with God and release it to Him.