Editor’s note: Learn to become the right man in every moment. Jason Wilson, in his new book The Man the Moment Demands, invites men to break free from the shackles of society and learn the ten characteristics of the comprehensive man that will equip them to overcome the many challenges of life. Enjoy this excerpt.
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The Leader guides and inspires others. He knows when to speak and when to listen — leading by example, not intimidation.
Many men believe leadership must be overtly visible. Anything other than being fierce is a sign of weakness. However, some of history’s greatest warriors — the samurai — were actually servant leaders. The word samurai originates from the Japanese word saburau, which means “to serve.” It was actually deemed dishonorable for a samurai to be without a master to serve. From this we see that the most effective leaders are in fact those who aspire to serve others rather than amassing power or seeking control.
From Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King Jr. to Mother Teresa and Mahatma Gandhi, the world has witnessed profound healing when servant leaders step forward. If the prevailing model of fierce, demonstrable leadership were truly effective, the world would likely be a better place. However, some men, driven by a solely masculine perspective, tend to center their leadership on themselves rather than the people they claim to lead. Moreover, when their plans and policies fail, they often place blame on others instead of examining their own actions.
As we consider the leadership role of a comprehensive man, you will come to understand that he is not only a servant leader of Yah carrying out the commands of the Most High here on earth but also the head of his household, practicing good listening skills and working with his wife to best serve his family.
At the heart of servant leadership lies sacrificial service and support — principles that stand in stark contrast to the pursuit of power and control. It prioritizes sacrificially serving and lifting up others, especially in moments of vulnerability and despair.
Sacrifice is not about doing what you desire; it’s doing what needs to be done, especially when you don’t feel like it.
When we move beyond our immediate wants and act from a place of responsibility, guided by a deeper purpose, we become a compelling force that pushes us beyond comfort zones to the frontlines of service and impact.
In a world plagued by greed, division, and deteriorating mental health, it is vital that men lead as servants rather than focusing on being served, leading by example, not intimidation (Proverbs 28:16). Rather than dimming someone else’s light to make your own seem brighter, invest your time in sparking their wick and, when needed, offer your support to help them kindle a new source of illumination.
However, be careful not to extinguish your own flame in the process, for while some may change when they see the light, others require the transformative heat of adversity to truly change.
You Can’t Save Everyone
One afternoon as I spoke to a new group of students in the Cave of Adullam, I grabbed a pitcher of water and a glass, placing both in front of me on the mats. I told the middle school boys that the glass represented them, while the pitcher symbolized me. The contents within the pitcher signified my love, sacrifice, and discipline, all of which I was willing to pour into them. Then, slowly and deliberately, I poured water from the pitcher into the glass, filling it to the brim.
I looked at all the boys and posed a question: “What needs to happen for me to pour more water into this glass?”
Their response was, “Someone has to drink it, Sharath!” (Instead of sensei, my students call me Sharath, which means “servant” in Hebrew.)
“Exactly!” Gently placing the pitcher of water down, I continued. “Until you drink from or apply the love, sacrifice, and discipline I offer, I cannot give you any more.”
It took me decades to learn this invaluable lesson as a community servant and youth minister. I would lose sleep whenever any of my students failed to apply my lessons in the real world — where they mattered most. After years of misplaced guilt, I eventually understood why Yahushua [Jesus] told His disciples,
For you always have the poor with you, but you do not always have Me. — John 12:8 NASB
In essence, the Messiah teaches us that there will always be people in need, but what truly matters is seeking His will above all else. When we do this, we reach those who can be reached.
During the early years of teaching boys in the Cave of Adullam, I often felt disheartened. Despite my fervent efforts, some young men chose paths of mischief. These choices often led to serious consequences: expulsion from school, banishment from their parents’ homes, incarceration in juvenile detention centers, or death. I now focus on the will of Yahushua in the moment, dedicating myself to the boys He sends my way who are impoverished in hope. During student orientation, I emphasize this philosophy by saying, “You’ve never seen a door at the mouth of a cave. You are free to leave at will, but if you return, you will always be met with the same loving welcome.”
I no longer feel like a failure when any of my students make poor decisions — it isn’t my fault. I cannot serve and save everyone. This is an imperative lesson for anyone who desires to be a servant, which every good leader must be.
Excerpted with permission from The Man the Moment Demands by Jason Wilson, copyright Yah Dabar LLC.
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Your Turn
Do you want to be a leader or a better leader? Serve. Jesus was a servant. Seek Him and His will and you will walk as He did, as a strong, loving servant. ~ Devotionals Daily